I do not feel like running for public office on President's Day.
I do not get angry when I am not asked to play dreidel during Channukah.
I do not sire children on Father's Day.
I do not travel the seven seas killing people on Veteran's Day.
I do not emmigrate on Canada Day.
I do not burn myself in effigy on Guy Fawkes Day.
I do not give speeches that kids will grow bored listening to on MLKJr Day.
I do not miraculously give birth to a deity on Christmas Day.
I do not serve myself on a platter on Thanksgiving Day.
I do not perfom miracles on All Saint's Day.
I do not rouse an angry mob to kill me on Good Friday.
Therefore, I will not feel all alone and unloved because it is St. Valentine's Day.
At least, that's the plan.
