So it turns out that dumb movie was right.
Getting cum in your eye burns.
It may not burn with multiple rrrrrr's and with the frenzied scowl of Miss Coco Peru, but it is still quite uncomfortable.
Even though I don't think anyone knew why my eye was red as I was walking to class, it was still my own personal little walk of shame.
Here lies a most ridiculous raw youth, indulging himself in the literary graces that he once vowed to eschew. Now he just rocks out.