As I've mentioned in previous posts, my birthday parties always have ended poorly. However, I didn't realize that the curse applied to all parties held in my name and not just the ones in August.
Now, I'm not very good at writing about parties. It's too hard to get down a general mood, and there are usually too many people to write about for a decent explanation, to say nothing of trying to think of pseudonyms for everyone. Plus, this isn't going to turn into one of those blogs where every Monday's post turns into a laundry list of drugs taken, drinks inbibed, and people slept with. Instead it's going to turn into one of those blogs where I complain about how much my weekend sucked.
At any rate, my graduation party sucked for the following four reasons.
1. My party was originally going to be held at a friends house, but her roommates quickly coopted the party. While the theme of "male degradation" sounds fun in the beginning, when it manifests itself as one of their overweight boyfriends in a corset and hot pants and pages ripped out of bad fashion magazines its not so great. Especially when their friends outnumber my friends, and my friends don't like their friends, and one of the roommates asks us to leave because we were bringing them down (in reality, we're just a lot classier and have outgrown keg stands). While it was incredibly insulting and rude to ask the guest of honor to leave, the party did suck and we didn't mind.
2. After that party, we stopped off at another friend's house, who were having people over and playing beer pong. Despite all of the hints we dropped, none of them caught on that I was graduating within 15 hours. I played second fiddle to an arguement about who was the most annoying while watching Pulp Fiction, who talked too much and misquoted the most lines.
3. While walking to the bars, my best friend wanted to stop by at her boyfriend's house and pick up some coals for her hookah for afterwards. He had told her he was at his frat for the night, doing some preparations for Channukah so we were just going to sneak in and out. We went in, using her key, and found him in bed with another girl. Yes it was awkward, and yes there was drama.
4. After all of this, I went home and felt sorry for myself because the night had been a disappointment. I posted something on craigslist, and got a reply. His pics were very nice, and he wanted to meet outside of the student union because its safer than meeting at his apartment in case either of us are serial killers. Except he never showed up, and I ended up sitting outside until 3 waiting for ass that never came.
About twelve hours later, I walked across the stage and picked up a folder with a note in it saying that the piece of paper will be coming in the mail in about 12 weeks.
