which is why I'm still awake at 5 am, Sunday morning, trying to distract myself. I don't know if I'll post this, but I'll wait until Monday to make that final decision. As of right now, this is purely cathartic.
Initials is on his way out, I've decided. He's too much of a snob, and not in a good-natured, irreverent way in the way that I like to think I am. It's more like an NPR-listening, opera listening, Sideways wine snob kind of snob. He's also too doting, which was nice at first, but now it's old and kinda demeaning. Tonight, when a friend of his mentioned the domestic partner benefits at his place of employment, Initials motioned to me and looked excited, which is jumping the gun considering that we've known each other for less than six weeks. And the sex is fucking weird. But that's not what's on my nerves at the moment.
I don't like his friends, but I'm willing to give it the benefit of the doubt. I still hang out with the college crowd, with fun alcoholics, while he is friends with sad alcoholics who don't like their dreary desk job. And I'm willing to bet that in ten years or so, I probably won't be as interesting to guys in their early twenties either.
I could surive hanging out with most of his friends occaisionally, but I can't stand his fag hag. She makes my fists curl and my jaw tense. She's slow, and fat, with rolls of neck flab, reminiscent of the Witch of the Waste from Howl's Moving Castle, only with more pockmarks. She wears tank tops too small for her, with arm fat that keeps jiggling for weeks afterwards. At age 29, she lives in her parent's basement with her three cats. She was too dumb to realize how snarky and rude I was to her after dinner.
Now, it wouldn't be so bad, except that she and Initials have plans to move in together once he finds a new job. And that ain't kosher by me.
Unfortunately, I'm at a quandry. I can't really tell him not to move in with her, because it's only been six weeks, and to be honest, I can't really see me ever falling in love with him, and I won't be making any long term plans with him, or even signing a short-term, month-to-month lease with him myself. I will definitely hang out with him less and less once the two live together.
I'm not really planning on breaking up with him soon, but if I were, I'm thinking about being a dick about it, and telling him I don't want to keep dating him if he moves in with her. If he actually does move in with her, I'll stop seeing him, and if he backs out, I'll pull the 'bros before hoes' thing and stop seeing him because he doesn't treat his friends well.
I don't think I could be that big of a dick. But I'd think about it.
But actually now I feel better about the whole thing, just letting it out, so we'll just have to wait and see. I'll keep you informed.
