When does the next Harry Potter drop, anyway?

Sometimes I have a love/hate relationship with the school newspapers. Sure, they're free, but the stilted language, grossly inadequate (or just gross) sex columns, and the opinion page which, were I living in a world of Harry Potter, would not only scream and yell but writhe about in a tourettic fit (see howler) leaves me cold and uninformed.

But then sometimes the comics page says something of pure genius, and I know that I'll be distracted in my AmLit class for yet another day.

This was one of those times.

(The Facebook) is nothing more than a trendy way to trick yourself into thinking people are interested in you.

It's just a self-serving online circle-jerk to help whiny emo kids and cam-whores draw even more attention to themselves, and I will not help stroke the ego of some 'hipster' from Kenosha.

Truer words have never been spoken.