It figures that the only guy who even remotely passes for attractive in my creative writing class is also, by far, the worst poet. In an almost amusing way.
Normally I try and respect other people's art, but this was just too much.
The assignment was to write an ode, and he chose to write an ode to the cross on the necklace of this one girl he hooked up with. (Yes, I know it's bad to assume that the author is the protagonist in the poem, but bite me.)
My favorite stanza:
I wanted to grab her arms and rip them off her sadistic body,
pin her down until she died from my penetration.
That sun golden figure flapped about as I pounded her,
offering anything short of redemption and rebirth.
Well, so much for developing a crush on him.