March 7, 2006

How's Your Romance?

Right before Valentine's Day, Madison was named as the most romantic city for couples in USA Today. Now, don't worry, I don't get my news from USA Today. Pictures and graphs are fine and dandy, but I happen to prefer words and complete, complex sentences. But the local newspapers had a field day with the news, including its inverse: if Madison is such a great city for couples, where does it leave us single folk?

Being the number one party school in the country (if not the world) leads to some fun parties and a happening bar scene, but parties and bars aren't exactly the places where relationships are formed. One-night-stands, sure, maybe even a few fuckbuddies, some phone numbers exchanged, but I've heard nothing qualitative coming from late-night beer bongs and toga parties.

Couple that with what amounts to be a pretty dismal gay bar scene in Madison (3 bars in the area: a dance club in the suburbs, a place frequented by 'older, generous' gentlemen, and a place on the far west side with issues with renewing its liquor licence) and you're left with one sad Bob.

I'm not much of a joiner, and the eye candy, both of the homo and hetero variety, is lacking as much as it was last semester. Add that to a group of friends that's been pretty stagnant since last September, and a deliberate weaning off of the chatrooms, and my right forearm has been getting quite a workout lately (last week notwithstanding).

Sure, I've been making attempts at casual sex, but they've never really been satisfying, or leading to a happy ending. And I've given up on it. It just isn't getting the job done, and it's just not the kind of guy I am.

Is there a point to all of this? Probably. But it's a point I've made many times before: It gets cold up here in Madison (hell, it snowed three inches yesterday), and my body pillow just isn't doing it anymore.
Here lies a most ridiculous raw youth, indulging himself in the literary graces that he once vowed to eschew. Now he just rocks out.