October 12, 2009

The Boyfriend Says Picking Up Guys At Church Is Skeezy

Normally I would agree with him, but we go to a really liberal church, and yesterday's sermon was in honor of Coming Out Day, and he was really cute. He was also totally making eyes at us throughout the sermon, and I wish I hadn't let the boyfriend talk me out of introducing ourselves after the service.

And it's not like I think we could have picked-him-up picked him up. Forgive me the Sex and the City reference, but neither of us are a Samantha, and it takes a lot more than introductions before a jump cut to the three of us in flagrante while Sarah Jessica Parker says a voice over saying "Even though they weren't Catholic, they spent the rest of the morning on their knees" or something of equal asininity.

Most likely, we would have said hello and exchanged phone numbers or IM names amidst small talk about the sermon, ending with vague promises to hang out sometime. At best, we'd hang out a few times before settling in for drinks at a movie at our place, and by the time someone is feeling handsy and confident enough and starts bringing up the possibility of moving to the bedroom, the third will have drank too much and veto fun that night, and the mood will be awkward and he'll stop returning phone calls. Not that that's happened before.

Oh well. I guess that's what Missed Connections are for.
Here lies a most ridiculous raw youth, indulging himself in the literary graces that he once vowed to eschew. Now he just rocks out.